Feeling Desire

A friend left this post to my last post and I loved the observation:
Thanks for this. I feel stuck in the same place. Realizing that where I’m at isn’t where I need to be, but not having any idea how to move out of that place. And how to allow God to extend grace to me in the middle of not being “there yet.” (My response is below)

I am realizing that learning to “be” in that place where “we are not where we need to be” is the first part of it. Because we often strive and do things to try to make ourselves not “feel” our depravity, we have to learn to rest in God’s grace and effectively “do” nothing (at least not the old, self-medicating actions that come so easy). Then, I can begin to enjoy God for His intense love and grace & wait for Him to satisfy me. I have great, incredible desires to be “holy”, to love others well, to be loved fully & those things are only satisfied completely in eternity. So, the satisfaction now comes in “tastes” and previews of eternity, but the only hope in getting that “taste” is when my desires go unmet and my heart is directed toward heaven.

Learning to feel true desire is the place where I am on the journey. Learning that I have deep desires and that nothing outside of Christ can satisfy allows me to love others (because I stop demanding that they meet my needs), to be loved by God (because I stop trying to gain love and acceptance from that which has been created), to wait for God (because I stop believing that anything else can satisfy).

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~ by Ted Wueste on June 28, 2008.

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